Brushing Shoulders

When a young man works in a common struggle alongside his father, he gains something greater than a teacher, a boss, or even a friend.  If the father welcomes his son into the project, they share a common purpose. They feel the same pain, the same desire, and the same victory. The struggle may be a house that needs built, a film that must be made, or a baseball game that can be won.

While they’re focused on the challenge, they brush shoulders. The son feels the muscles under his dad’s sleeve. Smells his dad’s sweat. Hears his dad’s breath. Then he knows that his father isn’t just a figure of authority but a man of flesh and blood. It is also then that the father faces his greatest task: to help his son rise up with integrity. In the same way that a good coach wants his player to surpass him in skill, a good father wants his son to be a better man than he.

After a game, a long day of work, or a tough struggle, the father and son sit back and relax. They share feelings of satisfaction, weariness, and victory, forming a bond of love and mutual respect. As they stretch their aching limbs, they rest as equals—not because the father has acted like a child, but because his son has become a man.